these pearly whites

Dumb as a shock jock. Please… look at these pearly
whites. Jeez…. As I protect the ball and drive it to
the hole y’all.

America wanted a Mr. Smarty Pants. Looks like I’m
not one of these. I’m just a gal from Alaska set for the task of
huntin and fishin. I didn’t make it to Washington and
the media kept on pokin and pokin and pokin. Letterman even made
a joke and.

Lord please forgive me, I’m making a full court press cause I’m blessed.
Lord forgive me, for I did not know, Trig is a course I never took. I was just good at basketball.
Now Trig’s my ball and I’m taken him to the hole y’all.
And teachin him these American family values. Where we shoot
wolves from helicopters and don’t believe in velociraptors.

See ya later. You can have it. Game over. I’m a-fightin for American values in the opposite direction.
Maybe go on a book tour. Buy some more clothes for sure.
Someone has to make me sound smart. Seems my vocabulary was too short.
As Mr. Smarty Pants flies to the same Russia I can see out my backyard.
As today he single-handedly deletes 1500 nukes.
and gets permission to fly in Russian air space. And what about Alaska, Obama?

I decided I’m serving my country best by quitting. My family said Hell yeah!
As we all know Palins quit best. Elect me for 2012 and watch me just bail. Just remember
I’ll do it so swell. Golly jeez. With these pearly whites smiling right at ya… please.
I’ll be learn-ed and speakin the American truth and standing up for the American pregnant youth.

Maybe Fox News will give me a show y’all. O’rielly and Hannity say
I can make a come back in 2012. Say I’m smarter than Obama I’m so swell.
Sayin I’m smarter than your momma. Or even your momma’s pajamas.
Cause Obama is a fascist and he’ll take your house and your job and smile at ya.
All the way to the liberal full court press. Where he jokes and pokes fun at himself.
As they love him like they are all Hare Krishnas. And me…not so much.